All I want for Xmas is......

Some can probably guess what the answer is.... Yes selfishly I only want my hair to stop falling out. I don't care if the spots don't grown back.

I've gone into disguise mode and have had my hair shortened in a blunt bob with the largest spots at the back and underneath shaved in a mod undercut.

I had this exact haircut when I hung out with mods and rude boys when I was 16.

So I had a few teary meltdowns this week. As my hair thins in general all over my head, I'm finding it everywhere. My clothes, pillow, bathroom, car and brushes are covered. The not knowing is excruciating. Not knowing if I will lose the lot or not.

I've quit gluten, reduced dairy but sugar is still well and truly in the picture. The more I try to deny the more I crave it. NYE resolution?

Insomnia has paid me a visit this morning as I write this it's 3:30am. It's windy outside and I can't turn my brain off. But as M will be getting up in a little over an hour, I'm going to give sleep another go.

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa spots galore

I was so will-powered up at the work xmas party yesterday. I ignored the cheese platters and chocolate, strudel and cheesecake. I ignored the bread, bread sticks, dips and feta salad. There was still plenty of GF options and Dairy free things for me to eat and I was full to bursting.

Came home and bought the family pizza while I happily ate a mango and a peach.

Then as Im watching TV I discover several new spots, all at the back of my head. I've been doing (nearly) everything right so why is it getting worse instead of slowing?

Im still 3 weeks away from seeing a naturopath and 6 weeks until my dermatologist appointment. I figure ill have no bloomin hair left by that point!!!!!

Im going to enjoy some funky short hair cuts over summer while I can.
Heres one Im really liking:

Ahhhhhh I am trying to find the positives when all I wanna do is sook! Alopecia is beginning to take over my life :(